Old lady syndrome


The day started off great. I was up at 8 studying for my exam, then went to get gas. At the gas station a man let me know that I have “a rock n roll booty.”…..Well bless your kind heart for thinking that. I gave him a THANK YOU! Because being real with myself, that will be the last booty compliment I’ll receive from a stranger in a very long time. I’ll take it.

;

I ate lunch with my thoughtful mother n law and her sister (both of which are beautiful). I just call Ann my aunt, is that strange? It’s awkward to say aunt in law? Is that a term? I’ll go with she’s my aunt. They had a blast feeding Harper as much food as she could hold! It was fun!

;

I went home, put the baby down for her nap, and then an hour later….I WENT INTO POLAR BEAR MODE.
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A nice 30 minute DEEP sleep. The kind you wake up from completely confused and don’t know what the heck is going on. That kind of sleep. I pray for that type of sleep everyday.

I frantically contacted the babysitter once I realized that my favorite band was playing in my own city tonight! 3oh!3 !!!! I know I Know… “Bell, that doesn’t really seem like your type of thing…” BUT IT IS!!! Apparently nobody else over the age of 25 thinks that. We got there and we may have well have been chaperones. It was an all age show, that should tell you all you need to know.

Common phrases of the night:

  1. Are those fish net stockings again!?
  2. They have to be gay right?
  3. Where are theses children’s mothers!?!?
  4. I can see that girls butt cheeks her skirt is so short!
  5. They’re on something.
  6. Really, do you think she’s over 13????
  7. I have to pee.
  8. I have to pee again.
  9. I am about to pee my pants again.
  10. I better not sneeze, cuz I’ll pee!!!!!

As you may deduct, MY daughter better not ever go to places like this!!! And if she REALLY wants to, I will go watch her like a hawk. And if she’s of driving age, maybe I can get a few cocktails while I spectate.

After people watching for 3 hours, my band came on. They were good, like they always are. They remind me of some of my fondest memories of birthdays and trips to Atlanta, and I started to feel that again as I heard their vulgar words. Midway though the concert I realized I was pregnant. Shocker. My feet felt bruised, my knees were getting creaky, and my hip was KILLING me. I was going downhill fast. John found me a couch to sit on thank goodness! I heard my favorite song come on, and we came in to see that last song and leave. Somehow it was actually their last song for the night! Perfect timing!

Now I am home, hungry since I threw up a few times after getting here… Isn’t that some crap, ladies? I didn’t drink a drop, but I am throwing up, have a headache, the munchies…without drinking.

I’ll accept it, I’m old. I can no longer do concerts that require me to stand for 5 hours, dance, jump, wave, and sing back. I need the sit down concerts from now on. Sigh…

Maybe I can keep from breaking my hip at a birthday party tomorrow.

Hope you’re feeling younger than me!

-BELL

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