Bringing y’all up to speed


HELLO FRIENDS!!!! It has been YEARS since I was active in this world, and a lot has changed since you last read my blog posts! I am going to try to catch you up, as well as I possibly can!

I guess the first thing I should let you know is that I went through a pretty yucky split last spring/summer. Honestly, it had been a long time coming, and only one of us wanted to fight for it. As most may know, one person fighting for a relationship is never enough.

The kids and I dealt with a lot of emotions attached to feeling abandoned. I cannot legally say that we were abandoned, but we had issues and feelings related to abandonment and betrayal.

It was nasty, it was hard, it hurt, but at the end of the day, I THANK GOD IT HAPPENED TO US!!!!! After our court order was signed in August (we had seen the judge in July but adjustments had to be made to the final order before it was completed), I bought a house for the kids and I! This was all very exciting and fun! DAY ONE of the kids living in their new home, and it was like I had brand new children! They were no longer in the pains of instability and drowning in their feelings of abandonment. It was just SO RIGHT. Almost perfect, actually! A fresh start!

This piece of the story is out of order to keep the story above simple, but after the judge signed our court order in August, I immediately met and started dating JP (aka Joshua). We’re talking like a few days after the order was signed. But like I said, it had been over for years, and also we had an official court date back in July. Potato potato, but I just want to make it clear that I did not date until everything was final legally speaking.

It was a real whirlwind, I’m talking we were OBSESSED WITH EACH OTHER. Every single lunch break the man had, we would race down the road to spend lunch together! Inseparable is a good word for it.

He had it all! EXTREMELY FUNNY, insanely smart, great job (because he’s good at it), had his life in order with a home and a car to go with it. AND HE LOVED CATS. That was my first mistake with the last one, lack of kitty love. Lesson learned!!!! You’ve got to know how to pat the puss (shout out to Erika Jane) properly to be a truly good attentive man.

So here’s your timeline on that relationship:

Met in August 2016

Engaged in October 2016

Married in October 2016 by a pastor named Betsy 😂😂. Also, my new name is Bell Price!

Obtained a great custody arrangement for my step son, Cooper, who is now 21 months old in April 2016. Cooper was 15 months at the time the custody was set in place.

In May 2016 we tragically lost my sweet Otis, my kitty LOVER. He got outside and hasn’t been seen since. It was a huge heartbreak and loss to me. I grieved that kitty being gone like I would grieve a family member, and I NEVER thought I’d say that in my entire life. I am NOT one of those people who say “oh pets are just like kids and their lives are as important”. I’m just not. It’s ok if you are, but it was just never how I operated.

In June, we fostered a sweet, floppy, fluffy kitten named Millie, who we took in for forever. She was THE SWEETEST EVER!

In July, we were given a kitten. My friend found me this kitten INTENTIONALLY. We didn’t even really know each other at the time except via the internet, so I’m 900000% sure this was a god thing. He knew how heartbroken I was, and spoke to Stacy, who, in turn got me Gizmo. This situation was all to perfect for it to be not God sent. He’s the most unique kitty I’ve ever had, besides Oats. He is a Norwegian forest cat with extra toes, and our connection is INSANE. It’s not normal. You only get one kitty relationship like what we have in a lifetime. Codependent is an understatement with Gizmo and I. He helped fill the fuzzy otis shaped hole in my heart.

In late July, we found out that we were expecting Baby Price! We were Extremely excited!!! OVER THE MOON!!!!!

In early August, Harper started kindergarten!!!

This next one is rough. I’ve even gone ahead and made a blog post to document it, so that after you read this, you can hear the full story.

In late August, our little baby went to be with Jesus. I was not ok. I am now, but I was not then. Gizmo laid with me 100% of the time, and would lick my tears off my face when they’d pour out while he purred and snuggled my face. Millie, our kitty had been sick WEEKS prior to this with something our vet couldn’t figure out. Millie left to be with Jesus the night after our baby went to be with Jesus. She laid on my belly for hours while I was in labor like pain the days prior. It was like she left with the baby to watch after him/her/them.

In September, we went on our honeymoon in Mexico!

…and here we are in October, celebrating our one year anniversary! WOOHOO!!!

There you have it, people, you are up to speed!!!!

Xoxo

Bell

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If you have a 8 month old you should get one of these…


 

I wish I’d gotten it sooner because she has been walking from furniture to furniture for a pretty long time!

If you get one, your kid may hate it the first week.  It’s scary.  But keep trying and they may just end up loving it like  mine!

 

Happy walking!

-Bell

Things we did


Lately our days have been filled with mood swings.  From everyone.  So today after feeling guilty from having Harper in her crib for what seemed like a ridiculously long time, trying to use the advice to let babies cry when they are trying to refuse their nap, I wanted to make sure when she woke up, she could have a little fun time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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So we decided to do a little dog watching:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

To try some fun finger friendly foods:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

=

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yeah…those are strawberries. If you REALLY know me, you know I’m absolutely obsessed with keeping Harper away from things that I think will cause allergies later on. This includes strawberries. The reason being: At my previous job, a coworker told me a horror story of her sons allergies to strawberries. The guy has to have an epi pen in case he is exposed to them. She told me she gave him lots of strawberries before the age of 1. I’ll never forget the stories she told me of his throat closing! SCARY STUFF. But somehow…some way…today I completely forgot my own rule of no strawberries. Mommy brain? Pregnancy brain? Who knows…I think I’ll still keep her away from strawberries until she’s a year old just in case…unless I have another brain fart. Next thing ya know, I’ll be giving the kid a bowl of cat food. I feel nutty.

Anyways….

On to be on the lookout for The Daddy:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When I was pregnant I always let John know certain things I wanted Harper to do as tradition. One of those things was having her waiting at the door waiting on him when he got home from work because I did that with my Daddy. I’ve been weary of our downstairs mixed with a crawling curious baby for a LONG time. I sweep and mop once a week and I get to see everything that is on that floor. Those things are things that will be shoved in my kids mouth if she sees them. It freaks me out. One of my pet peeves is someone saying to me “you’re never going to build her an immune system” or “you can’t protect her from everything”. I can do whatever the heck I want with my kid. I can be overly cautious sometimes if I dang well please. I know she’s not going to get salmonella from our hardwoods, but just let me work at my own pace. I’ll start let her do more things when I feel like it.

In other news: I have decided to stop attempting to sew. Reason being…today I found a sewing needle in the baby’s rooms’ carpet!!!!!!!!! Upon later inspection, I realized the baby had two tiny prick marks on her. CAN WE SAY GUILT????? I can just see her shoving it in her eye. What else have I dropped in the house?!??!? She can find ANYTHING! I’m making vacuuming twice a week a priority now.

I hope you did some happy things this afternoon! 🙂
-Bell

While you’re here help me out and click HERE to vote for me on Top Baby Blogs!  Just click the owl on the left, and your vote will be officially submitted!  If you’re feeling generous, you can do this every 24 hours!

We got skills.


I really like lists.  So I made a few.

 

Newest motherly skills I’ve obtained:

  • I can change a diaper in about 5 seconds flat.  It’s no joke.  I’ve had several people say WOW…that was fast!!
  • I can also change a poop cloth diaper without making a mess.  These diapers scare EVERYONE I know.  Not me.
  • I know how to fashion a baby blanket into a nose covering turban for those really rough smelling jobs.
  • I can open a “lift and unlock” baby gate whilst holding: sweet baby jesus, 1 drink, a purse, and a hot pocket.    If you have encountered one of these fancy gates, you know what a task it is to get into or out of one without considering you should just scale over it.
  • I can pour out exactly 6 ounces into a bottle WITHOUT using the ounce markers on the side of the bottle.
  • I can feed Harper baby food without using a bib.  I’m about 80% successful with this, so you don’t HAVE to count it.
  • Super sonic hearing.  90% of the time, I hear the sounds she makes and can picture exactly what she’s doing.

Example:

  1. She’s in the crib.  I hear “THUD”  I know she was standing up and fell over(inside the crib, not onto the floor)  to hit her head on the rail.
  2. In the mornings I hear “clack clack clack clack clack clack”…I know she is holding her pacifier in her hand and raking it across her crib rails.  Yeah, like a prisoner in Guantanamo Bay.
  3. I hear “BAHBAH BAH BAH BAH BAH”….I know she is pressing her face against the crib over and over again while exhaling.
  4. I hear “splish splash”………This means I’ve left the toilet seat open

 

Harper’s skill list:

  • She can open our electrical socket covers with one hand.
  • She possesses the innate ability to find a spec of ANYTHING, even after I use that fancy robot thing (the vacuum) to suck up what I thought was everything in the floor.
  • If she gets bored in her crib, she will turn on her little light up fish tank and play.
  • She knows how to turn the TV volume up to 100.  We usually keep it at 20.
  • She can water board herself in the tub.
  • She can completely reset every apple product we own.
  • Reverse the effects hair plugs.
  • She can safely dismount the ottoman.  SEE:

 

Ways I think she could make a living at 9 months doing:

  • Baby proofing expecting parents’ homes.
  • Modeling, of course.
  • Going door to door as a singing telegram.
  • Prepare expecting parents’ animals by beating them, chewing on their ears, and pulling their fur out.
  • Clean floors.   (duct tape a wet wash cloth on her, and she could mop that sucker too.)
  • She could collect all the hair she pulls from me, and sell to the chinese lady that owns the hair kiosk at every mall in the united states.

Hope you like listing as well.

 

-Bell

 

Roll call!!


New Zealand!!!

Canada!!!

United Kingdom!!!

and Austria!!!

 

Please let me know if you are a reader not from the USA!  I need someone to confirm these hits are real, they happen every single day, leading me to believe I may be known worldwide!  🙂  Comment me, message me, whatever ya gotta do to let me know you’re really out there!!!

🙂

xoxo

BELL

This…..is greatness.


http://fitmamain.wordpress.com/2012/09/11/someone-call-a-doctor-this-scale-is-broken/

 

It’s not everyday that I read a blog post that just absolutely has me rolling!!!  This is share-worthy.  Good work fit mama!!!!!

hope everyone enjoys!

-Bell

If you really knew me…


If you really knew me

You’d know I hate  moths.

You’d know I miss the friendships I left in Chattanooga.

You’d know I feel the most like myself when I am working in healthcare.

You’d know that being a Mom has given me more patience.

You’d know my whole world stops when I daydream about our future children.

You’d know that on hard days I cry in the shower.

 

If you really knew me 

You’d know sometimes I dream of being a nurse.

You’d know I have a hard time telling people that I have panic attacks in the bathroom when I get overwhelmed.

You’d know It makes my day when someone goes out of their way to help me.

You’d know I can always find room in my stomach for  water.

You’d know that I believe in wishing on the first star I see.

You’d know sometimes I feel like  I’m a bad wife.

You’d know I cook certain dishes to remember certain people or times in my life.

 

If you really knew me..

You’d know I don’t like anything that goes in a salad.  Especially lettuce.

You’d know that having people over stresses me out.

You’d know I’m full of thoughtfulness.

You’d know I have a stack of books that I have read cover to cover, and keep as trophies.

You’d know I put way to much sour cream on EVERYTHING.

You’d know my heart melts when I see a fluffy kitten.

 

 

If you really knew me, you’d know…

 

You’d know that nap time is the highlight of my day.

You’d know that I collect tervis tumblers and beads.

You’d know I love watching Teen Mom and 16 & pregnant every Tuesday.

You’d know I try to see how long I can go without washing my hair.

I desperately want to be a good mother.

I am afraid of losing any member of my family.

 

If you really knew me, you’d know…
Just now I am figuring out cloth diapering.

I have a hard time with antepartum depression.

I am starting to become comfortable with the idea that I will watch Despicable me every day for the next 2 years.

I am terrified of falling down the stairs while holding the baby.

I have scoliosis.

 

If you really knew me, you’d know…

 

I cry when I hear “to make you feel my love” play on the radio.

I blame myself for not being able to last longer with breastfeeding Harper.

My family back home is very quiet and shy.

I still sleep with my blankie.

I feel guilty that I accepted so much help from my parents in my early twenties.

I guard my deepest feelings from anyone who poses a threat.  Which is nearly everyone.

 

If you really knew me, you’d know that…

 

It takes a really long time to gain my total trust, and it can be lost in the blink of an eye.

I cry when I see other people cry.

I love to sing and dance during church.

I eat a lot of fried fish sticks with home made tartar sauce.

I am petrified by heights.

You’d know my favorite food is Nanny’s green beans.

You’d know my favorite time is spent sleeping with Harper.

If you really knew me, you’d know I want you to vote for our blog on Top Baby Blogs by clicking HERE.

 

Love ,

Bell

 

 

 

 

Holy Mary mother of Jesus…


My kid thew up 2.5 jars of baby food at lunch today.

That is 8.5 ounces.

That’s a little over ONE CUP.

2 of the jars of vomit hit the freshly cleaned carpet in a giant green splatter.

The other remaining half a container of vomit went all. over. my. arm.

In my head repeating itself over and over was this phrase “do NOT throw up on your baby.”

I can see it now. One day I let my kid roll of the side of my bed, and the next, I throw up all over her.

Next thing ya know, I’ll end up on Dr. Phil.

Oh yea…I’m posting a picture of it, just so you guys can gag along with me.

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The almost 11 week post


…I know……..who posts on that?  It’s not a MAJOR mile marker.  But I’m bored after scrubbing our bathroom floor with bleach so I would like to treat myself with some web therapy.

I am exactly 1 week and and 2 days close to being at the end of the first trimester!!!  The times are coming where everyone can tell me “oh great you’re out of the first trimester, you’ll feel great!!”  I know better than to believe that.  They’re all liars.  Yea, I said it.  LIARS!!!:)

So here’s what’s going on:

How far along?

10 weeks 5 days (practically 11 weeks)

 

Size of baby?

Size of a golf ball.

 

Weight Gain?

6 lbs.  I gained that at week 4 and it’s stayed there since then.  Not sure how.

 

What I miss:

The absence of back pain.  That all went away in my third trimester with Harper…it’s all coming back to me now….

 

Cravings:

Last week it was peach yogurt.  This week, I have wanted:  oatmeal with apples in it, Koolaid, captain D’s, chick fila ice cream cones, eggs over easy…I’m sure there are more I can’t think of.  I haven’t been AS drawn to pizza hut or my normal ice cream combo like last time.

 

Symptoms:

Nausea- no more vomiting this week.  YAY

Back pain

Hip pain

Worse knee pain

Weepiness

 

Best moment this week:

Buying the books for my small group at church.  I got excited to read about the things we are going to work on during the meetings!

I also made a 100 on my first anatomy quiz.

 

Worst moment this week:

Not being able to get a much needed pedicure because of an injured toe.

ROUND LIGAMENT PAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!  omg wtf fml

 

Excited for:

My 12 week appointment in a little over a week.

FALL

Pumpkin spice frappacinos at Starbucks

 

Alright, that’s it.  Glad i could release some boredom onto you.

 

Hope you’re having a good week!!!

 

-Bell

 

Click HERE to vote for us on Top Baby Blogs!!

 

 

A few words for the weekend


We John and Harper woke up bright and early on Saturday morning to watch the early Auburn game. I’m not even sure that she saw any of it…but she just really looks so cute in that outfit!

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Some things happened…then at bed time, we had bathies. The girl really is rich in toys. RICH!!

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The evening was rounded out by a good ole fashioned knob twirling. The girl is after my own heart. She loves knobs. Those are a set of my favorite pair too. eh what am I saying? I like all the knobs in my collection!

N

\

NEW Things from this week:

– I have figured out the TRICK to successfully feeding Harper. If you’ve read the blog, you know I’ve been having issues terrible baby drama associated with food. Here’s the play by play: step 1: Turn on “Despicable Me” Step 2: Turn it UP Step 3: get in her line of movie viewing sight with a spoonful of food until she gets frustrated and opens up so that you get out of her way. REPEAT!!!!!!!!! I have had 2 container success with this method every single time. She may be winning this game of puppetry, but she’s eating and that’s all I really wanted.

– I figured out a good finger food for her. Baby mandarins!! Genius!!! The waiter at our latest restaurant outing brought her some. This man has solved one of my life’s greatest mysteries…what finger foods will she eat a lot of, while at the same time still being “good” for her??? I am a little compelled to call this guy at the restaurant and ask him if he knows of any other top secret foods she will love. But that would just be crazy. Wouldn’t it?

In other news… John is missing his dog, Jackson. and I am missing my Tom Theo the first. What’s up with our animals disappearing??

These are 2 possible scenarios:

That Jackson is involved with an underground gang in our community and is just too caught up in all the dollas. After all….the dollas do make ya holla.

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You can take the alley out of the Tom, but you cannot take the Tom out of the alley.  I suspect his petty murders have escalated and he needs to hide out for a week to assure our family’s safety.

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Sounds legit, right?

Until next time,
Bell

REMEMBER TO HELP US OUT BY VOTING ON TOP BABY BLOGS FOR US !  JUST CLICK HERE TO DO IT!

The big problem is…


she’s lookin’ a little too “honey boo boo” -esq in this one.

Did I just say that?

Poppin’ off at the fair


A few exciting things:

MY PREGNANCY POP CALENDAR!!!! Don’t you just die? I love it! Now…whether to open frame it or just hang it in baby 2.0’s room for display…hmm

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

LOVE IT.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Last weekend, Harper got to go to the fair. She met a few furry friends that she wasn’t so sure about…and some of them….well I wasn’t so sure about.

….ummmm…make it stop touching me mom, I know this is NOT a kitty.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We so NEED this. CUTENESS!!!

I was closing my eyes preparing to be spat at…but he didn’t he REALLY wanted some pettin though!

I hope this post wasn’t too exciting for you! 🙂 Off to a night of good sleep and hopefully no round ligament pain! That stuff is for real. No joke. OUCH.

-Bell

Statistically speaking…


I am almost always hungry.

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Note the almost MIDNIGHT time stamp on this one.

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Those things really happened. With this pregnancy I am SO HUNGRY!!!!!! Even though I do get nauseated, it’s not every single day like my first. I have about 1-2 BAD days a week, I’ll take that.

Things that make me turn green:

  • The smell of grease.
  • Any lingering smell in general, I can’t sit in a restaurant on even a moderately good day without turning various shades of green.  I’m a to-go person now.
  • The sight of liquor.  GAG.  Even if it’s on my TV.
  • Wet paper.  “What?  Why do you have wet paper?”  Sometimes the baby will find a little piece of a napkin or a little piece of cardboard from one of her toy’s packaging and stick it in her mouth.  This makes wet paper.
  • Old bananas.  I don’t make a practice of keeping old nasty bananas lying around…but recently, I let Harper munch down on some for breakfast and she stored a few pieces in her high chair crack.  Every time one is discovered, I have to have a little conference with myself about not hurling.
  • Hearing SOMEONE burp.    Men…….

Recap of a few weekend moments:

Friday was the day the baby went crazy.  SOMETHING happened.  SOMETHING.  She was MAD.  Furious.  In a state of inconsolable rage.

WHERE DID MY BABY GO?!?!!?!  AND WHO IS THIS CHILD SOMEONE REPLACED HER WITH:

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After a good 30 minutes of an inconsolable baby, she gathered herself together and had fun with our company…while sniffling for about an hour after because it was SO BAD.

If there’s one word of the weekend I would have to pick CHEESE.
She likes cheese. I like that she likes cheese. I like to watch her eat cheese. She leaves MY food alone when she eats cheese. She doesn’t yell at me when she eats cheese. I also like to eat cheese.

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Today after being in constant state of green, I was able to get Harper to take a nap with me. She never does this for me anymore.
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I hope your weekend was filled with a little less green and a lot more cookout.

Oh and btw- click HERE to vote for our blog on Top Baby Blogs!!! 🙂
-Bell

We gots issues.


So lately Harper and I have had an issue.  Well It’s more like an issue she has with other people…not including me.

She’s decided that she will only eat baby food from me, and fights it with everyone else.

What’s up with that?  It’s SO frustrating:

  1. because I worry when I leave her in someone else’s care they can’t follow my meal plan instructions for her.
  2. that when John his home, he is reluctant to feed her baby food because she gives him an extra hard time.
  3. that others have to give her a bottle instead of baby food, which makes her poop LIQUID and SUPER STINKY!!!! (making me think the milk doesn’t sit well with her)
  4. because I know it stresses out anyone I ask to watch her when feeding time rolls around.

 

Why does she eat so well with me?  She eats 1.5-2 packages every sitting with me, but when with others, only eats 1/2 a container!

 

These are my possible answers as to why:

  1. Maybe others don’t recognize which foods need to be phased into her favorite foods so she will like the taste more.  Somehow I have a sense of what she doesn’t want because of taste.  I know…I have an extreme advantage of knowing her best.
  2. Others give up when she starts to go into ANGRY BIRD mode.  I understand that completely.  She flails her arms around, tries to throw the food in the floor, and SCREAMS!!!  It’s easy to be defeated during that.
  3. Others just don’t have my ninja skill set for feeding my child.  I have tricks and dances that tend to work if she starts to go downhill.  When I know she is still hungry and is just fussing, I MAKE her eat.  She’s not allowed to leave the chair until she’s satisfied my food in baby quota.

 

I did my normal “scour the internet” thing and realized nobody in the world has this same problem.  Or they aren’t on google.  🙂

The next step in helping with this is figuring out how to remedy it.

I want to try:

  1. Asking others to feed her more routinely so that she gets used to it.
  2. Adding a few soft table foods to her meal plan…because who doesn’t love to play with their food?
  3. _____________________________________
  4. _____________________________________

Those blanks mean suggestions are greatly appreciated!!!!!

New foods I am considering:

  • Banana pieces
  • Grilled cheese
  • cheese slices
  • tofu
  • french toast
  • waffels
  • scrambled eggs
  • canned green beans
  • macaroni and cheese
  • peas
  • cheese sticks
  • baby tomatoes cut small
  • grapes cut small
  • blueberries

Does anyone out there recommend any fun foods to start to try!?

Munchin’ on her first platter of food!

I hope everything goes good with all these new things we have to try!

Have a good night!
-Bell

Things you may have missed


So I just realized if you only come here from other sites you may have missed a few of my posts because they were created on much earlier dates since I wasn’t ready to release them at that point.  If you want to check them out I updated these:

https://birminghambell.com/2012/07/29/our-little-blastocyst/

https://birminghambell.com/2012/08/06/ahhhhh-crap/

https://birminghambell.com/2012/08/09/i-wish-i-knew-what-week-it-was/

https://birminghambell.com/2012/08/26/the-pits/

Happy blogging!

-Bel

I want these to be a few of my favorite things…


I’m up to my old tricks again.  Scouring the internet for new and different baby items.  So far I NEED these:

1. A Mexican bola necklace

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2.  Baby Moses bassinet basket

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3. 280 days to pop calendar

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4. Pretty nursing pads

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5.  A few maternity hospital gowns (I promise I’ll wear them this time!!!)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

6.   I need a rental company to let me borrow one of these for the next 7 months

 

 

 

 

 

 

7.  A fetal doppler

8. A vintage love seat to nurse on in baby’s room!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

9.  A jean maternity jacket for everyday use!

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10. All the winter pajamas I can handle!!!

There you have it.  My needs.

 Bell

 

Click HERE to vote for us on Top Baby Blogs.

The pits


I’m starting to realize what is happening to me once again… Partum depression.  Yuck.  It makes me cringe to even type it.  You’ll probably never hear me speak it.

I should be super happy, but I’m really not.  I can’t pin point why I’m not, either.  All I know, is that the smallest things send me over the edge into a very sad state.

The most frustrating part about it is the lack of help and understanding from of others so far.

This is the boat I find myself in right now:

1. No local doctors have any openings until late October.  Even though I call them and tell them my pregnancy depression situation.  That is almost enough to make me walk into the appointment resenting the doctor.

2.  John doesn’t really understand why I act the way I do, or why I get sent over the edge over seemingly meaningless things.  Of course, they’re not meaningless to me.

I don’t like being in the boat.

While being a mother, and in “the boat” I automatically shut everyone out thinking about these questions:

If I tell people about the way I feel, will they think I am being a bad mother to Harper?

AM I being a bad mother if I am sad while I take care of Harper?

If I don’t feel close to my unborn baby, will I ever?

If I tell people I don’t feel close to this pregnancy, will they think less of me?

If people know, will they treat me like they feel sorry for me?

Will people think I am strange if I tell them about my extreme anxieties during pregnancy?

Will people think I will have a jacked up baby if I have to take medicine during pregnancy to treat depression or anxiety?

I can only assume that anytime people are afraid of what others think, that is the primary reason for keeping things to themselves.

I guess I am saying these things, only to put them out there.  To let others know HOW I feel, not really WHY I feel that way, or what they can do to help. To let people who want to judge, judge…and to let others dealing with a similar situation know that they’re not alone.

I know it will go away.  100%.  I know this because I’ve already lived it once.  I do consider myself lucky that the feeling lifted itself the very moment Harper was born.  It really was as if God had taken away ALL of those bad feelings as soon as she entered the world.

I guess until I am able to speak with my doctor, I just have to power through this the best way I can.  I know that once I start to hear baby 2.0 kick, I will feel joy and attachment.  At least I hope so.  Those were some of the very happy moments of my pregnancy with Harper.  I knew she was there, I knew she was okay, and it wasn’t just a picture to look at from the doctor, it was a feeling of life inside of me.  I need that to happen soon.  Since I am at 8 weeks right now, maybe I can expect it in 7-10 weeks.  Until then, I may be using the blog as my prenatal release.  Do enjoy!  Even the bad posts! 🙂

-Bell

I posted this and sat on it privately for about a week. I’ve looked at it fifty times (not for any kind of poor grammar, but to agonize over what I was exposing to others.) I can’t look at it anymore, I just have to send it on it’s way into the universe that is the internet.

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Sandwiches, cream soda, and snobiz.


After a solid week of myself nagging John about the ratio of time spent with his friends, video games, and football, I got a nice date in the park. Jersey Mikes, cream soda, cheesy poofs, and SNOBIZ!!!!! (I also got some pretty roses!)

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Busted

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SNOBIZ!!!
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MOM…it tastes funny!!!

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Notice how we had to restrain her arms?? I think if I ever go to the Snobiz alone, I’ll try to swaddle her to provide maximum son cone eating efficiency.

Hope everyone had a good Thursday as well!!

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Love,
Bell

I am a bacon eating procrastinator.


It should be of no surprise to find out I love bacon. LOVE BACON. Here is what I created after scouring the internet for bacon popsicle recipes. Of course I was a little lazy and just used a popsicle I had at the house. It served its purpose.
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I am investigating other forms of bacon art.  I’ve even convinced John to throw a bacon themed football party, in which everyone attending will bring a dish made with bacon in it.  Do other people like bacon this much?  I’m sure there are a few.

Moving along…I forgot to document our weeks latest adventures!  On Monday, after a little work and a little play, I brought Miss Snuggles home.  Usually she won’t be this calm and snuggly…I don’t question that.  I just take whatever she has to give.  She decided to do this with me for about 5 minutes.  It was lovely.

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Once The Daddy got home, I set Harper up in front of the TV in the Bumbo…she kept making this face:

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Yea, that’s my leg to the right of her. She is gripping it with everything she has…I think it’s a tactic to keep me from escaping.

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Next week, I am on a mission to find a cheap copy of Monster’s, Inc.  Just to prepare for next years big release of Monsters inc 2!!!!

I have been searching near and far for a BOO costume that Harper can wear on Halloween this year…but I’m so disappointed.  Every one I find is for a size 4/5 or higher, not to mention UBER expensive!!!   I’m almost ready to give in and start making one myself.

Hope you had a good monday!  (Yea, I realize today is Thursday-sue me.)

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Love,

Bell